31 Dec 2008 9.56pm
2 more hours and that's it, goodbye 2008. I can't wait for the clock to tick 12. Not that i'm so looking forward to counting down, but 2008 is everything but smooth. Apart from my wedding, nothing else has been good so far, especially in job aspects. I felt like i'm being killed everyday.
Come to think about it, i secretly told myself before the wedding, that as long as my wedding went smoothly, i'm willing to bear any other worse scenario. Despite the fact i'm only whispering, i guess heaven still got the message and granted me the wish immediately.
So . . . with me extremely tired out by the 'eventful' year, i'm ready to welcome 2009 with open arms anytime. Though 2009 doesn't promise any better life, at least it marks a new beginning.
Yesterday, Hubby asked do i have any new year resolution. For the past 27 years, i never had. Because i know i most probably just say and forget. But yesterday i answered him yes. A very general yet my most heartfelt desire.
" . . . to be happier . . "
~
29 Dec 08 10.00am * Cold Morning
Yesterday, a day with a mixture of weather, i got to attend a sweet simple wedding at the Mandai Orchid Garden. This was the second time friends of ours decided to make this garden the place to share their joy.
Though i was not closely related to the wedding couple (the bride was hubby's ex-classmates), i can't help but felt excited, since this was the first wedding we were be going after our own wedding in june 08. And finally a reason to pretty up myself a little bit!
I guess it was a right choice for them to have the wedding in the evening.
The light breeze brightened up everyone's mood, as the soft drapes of white lining sway gently in the wind.
The garden is a gentle upslope.
And guests are scattered themselves all around, to indulge in the unusual peace that nature gives, away from the city blast.
The bride, in her pretty gown, enjoyed her loveliest moments, with dear family and friends.
As the wedding couple posed for their shots, we hide somewhere and started to 自拍 too. :P
As the initmate wedding came to an end, it marked the beginning of their new life as Mr and Mrs.
We wish them all the happiness, and as we made our way home, i secretly hoped the same happiness for ourselves.
~
26 Dec 2008 14.37
Suddenly it dawn upon me. I wasn't the only one wandering, lost in a hopeless world of unfairness. A simple lunch gathered a few of us together. And within a hour of temporary break from work, i realised how many of us belong to the same of a kind.
We all suffered due to various reasons, but the torment we went through, they are quite the same.
When I break down once in a while, I always cry feeling so lonely. That why am i the only one who suffered. But now i know. I'm not alone.
Everywhere in this world, this category of people where i belong, is scattered all around.
The moment when i felt like a lost soul, i guess that somewhere, someone is losing his way too.
~
An hour passed very fast. But somehow though i didn't feel very full from that small bowl of noodles, i felt full in another sense. My heart is full.
What we had shared during that hour, is a pat on my shoulder. As we chatted about our own experiences, we laughed, we shaked our head in disbelief, and most of time, we remained in silence while our brains absorbed.
When we all returned to our workstation, the corner of my lips curled up without my notice. :)
12月16日 08：47
12月3日那天，是考级的最后第二天。那时的我刚送完两位考官到校外考点，一整个早上就这样来来往往地坐德士。回来办公室时，已累不成形。
这时，另一位我非常尊敬的考官朝我走来。她是许老师。虽然年迈已高，但仍然非常健壮，走起路来简直是健步如飞。
她看着我，慈祥地对着我笑，说：
~ 你啊，真是工作的好模范！ 做事非常严谨， 给我的印象特别好。。
我简直是愣住了。
虽然我参与考级工作已第3回，见到许老师也有3次，但每次都是一年见一次，每次也不过是最多两周的时间。况且，招待考官这种比较PR的事，都是让老板和经理来做，我都是负责较幕后的工作。如果不是非要我开口，通常我都不会多说。因此，考官对我的印象应该不会很深。
但眼前的许老师给我这样的称赞，让我真是一阵窝心。
老师继续说：但你就少了一些年轻人该有的活力。。
老师说的没错。我很久以前早已失去了活力。日复一日地工作，周边的几乎都是一些不公平，不快乐的事，我怎么可能活力得起来？
唯有静静地做着事，什么也尽量不追问。
没想到一年只见一次的老师，竟然看出了我的努力。
虽然老师的几句简单的话，实际上也不能给我什么。但在心灵上，多少给我注入几份安慰。
虽然环境或许不需要我这种人，只会傻傻地埋头苦干。但至少有一个人，赞同了我。
~
12 Dec 08 12.23pm
6 Dec. The only day in the year i can rest my heart at ease, be as lazy as i want without giving a reason. Though life have been rather hard these few months, there was no reason to skip making my birthday a little more fun!
So. . . to me, life is nothing if there is no good food. So we decided to have a feast at Kuishin-Bo . .
We simply love the paper steamboat. We wanted to try all the 3 flavours but sadly, our capacity of stomach did not agree to it.
And so there was food, food . . . and more food. .
For 2 long hours, we bited and bited and chewed.
Seriously, I'm pretty 认真 when i'm eating. As some may have heard, 认真的女人最美丽. I must have looked like a beauty queen when i'm eating. Wahahaha . . . *munch munch*
As the xmas tree glitters and enjoyed being in the limelight, i then realised my favourite season is already around the corner.
To end the day with a sweet note, Hubby suprised me with an ice-cream cake! When is the last time i have cake for my birthday? ....
And throughout the day, i received blessings from friends through sms and facebook. Thank you my friends. Your few simple words had meant so much to me, they will keep me blessed for the next 12 months. Before i hope to hear from you again.
~
11 Dec 08 8.29am
I was wrong. I thought i came back to earth. But no, i remain in hell.
Never had i been through a full year that contains so much problems. Almost nothing had been smooth.
This year drained away my passion, my beliefs, my values. What's left now is a lousy body with distorted mental.
Work should not be like this.
I should learn to be stronger, not weaker.
I should learn to laugh it off, not keeping it in my heart.
But all i learn is the agony just goes on.
It doesn't seem to end soon either.
~
5 Dec 08 09.13
The day i came back to earth. Away from hell.
The war was over, and i had survived. It is a relief, and i'm able to breathe normally. Such a lousy person i am, though being trained for 3 consecutive years, i can't help but feel stressed up during the event. I skipped my breakfast, i even skipped going to the washroom. My heartbeat races like i'm facing a predator. Rushing in and out, i trying to keep my cool, but my messy hair gave me away.
I am enjoying the peace after war now. Give me a few moments before i share more with my after-feel.
Stoning in office is not right. But i'm going left today. :P
24 Nov 2008 13.26
If gals have reservist, the next 2 weeks will be reservist for me. I had blinked for don't know how many times, but the time will not pass by any faster. It's time for me to face the truth.
See ya all on 5 Dec, where i shall resurface on earth. Till then.
~
17 Nov 08 2.45pm
Now is it, the last battle i should fight before everything comes to an end. 1 more week and the event will starts. All the effort that accumulates throughout the year is for this to happen.
I shall endure, and tell myself, when i open my eyes again, it's over, and better life is all i would want to hope for.
I have no religion, but God bless me please.
~
12 November 2008 8.00pm
While life is getting more and more all-work and no fun, hubby and i decided to spend a short getaway at Bintan Lagoon Resort. Afterall, it is still considered overseas and yet is just a short 55 minutes trip away. So here we set off on 1 Nov. . .
~
1 Nov 12.30pm (Singapore time):
we reached Tanah Merah Ferry Terminal, and was suprised by how new and clean the whole place is. I always thought Ferry Terminal's default will be wet, old, and full of 青苔. But apparently not . . :P
2.30pm (Bintan Time):
After boarding the fast ferry, we reach Bintan in just 55 minutes. Fast leh~ Blue sky and cottonlike cloud. Brighten up our day instantly.
3.00pm (BT):
Finally after travelled by car, ferry and bus, we reach our Forest Suite!
We decided to go ahead and pamper ourselves so we booked a super suite, that comes with a separate living room and bedroom and a really big jacuzzi bathtub that could fit 4 persons, though we are not into that.
4.00pm (BT):
we strolled along the beach and being the low tide hours, we sinked our feet into wet soft sand, which in a few moments, will be covered by sea water again.
6.00pm (BT):
basically we realised if we never played any sea sports, it was sort of boring . . . hence we thought just have an early dinner. Really, food is really the only thing that made me showed my thumb up :P
8.00pm (BT):
Bintan's sky seems to darken much earlier than Singapore. By 6.30pm i thought it was 8pm. AND, to my suprise, it was also so much more humid! The whole day i felt like a super giant post-it pad, really to stick on to anywhere . . Though i had wanted to stay in the cafe longer (by the way the whole resort was open-air concept), i really couldn't stand being so sticky so we retreated back to our room.
2 Nov 2008 8.00am (BT):
Woke up to a fresh new morning. It wan't as humid in early morning, so we thought finally we can enjoyed our breakfast 'peacefully'. And furthermore, we get the table nearest to the lovely pond! Seeing such a nice quiet pond, just made us wanna do some yoga . . we thought we are lucky. . haa . . but not for long . . .
9.00am (BT):
Hubby first sensed some suspious creature 'swimming' in the pond. Snake? Eel? no . . . but it was then i though we will definitely not very lucky to sit so near to the pool. Meanwhile the unknown creature continue to swim silently with its tougue sticking in and out.
Alright, enough of guessing, it is the Bintan's famous Komodo Dragon. Brother Komodo must be sick of us guessing what it really is, so gave us a full body view. My breakfast was stuck in my throat. . . HELP!
And it decided to swim nearer to us . . for some close up shots too . .
10.00am (BT):
After an 'eventful' breakfast, we tried out the buggy ride, which we concluded was the most exciting experience in Bintan.
When is the last time i drive? i couldn't remember, but hubby and i were just so thrilled to get behind the wheel! How nice is we can just get around Singapore in such cute mini. Suit my size too . . . :P
Hubby was "all praise" for my driving skills! yoohoo! F1 race, here i come!
12.30pm(BT):
Had our last meal in bintan before catching the ferry back. At least i learnt they called this yellow noodle there and not the commonly known maggie.
me: Maggie mee?
Cashier: Yellow noodle . .
me: Maggie mee?
Cashier: yellow noodle . .
me: whatever lah . .
2.30pm (BT):
and we onboard the ferry again . . taking back mermories of komodo san, buggy ride to nowhere, curly yellow noodle that is not maggie, and of course being walking post-it pad for 2 whole days.
~
